Good morning friends

Last week, I was returning from my bank and thinking about the chores which were pending, when someone called out to me and said,” Auntie, didn’t you recognise me? “. Frankly speaking, I did not remember this person at all, but then I have always been bad at recognising faces or with connecting the face with the name. In my youth, this would cause a lot of problems and I had to grope around the conversation to put a name to the face ! Now that I am a senior citizen, however, I can blame it on my age and honestly declare that I had not recognised that person…. And that is what I did in this case. This person, probably in his forties, told me that he had done the painting work in my house some years ago. Maybe it was true, but still I could not really remember him. When he told me that he had done some work in the bathroom along with the painting, I was quite sure that he had mistaken me for someone else. Then he started telling me that he had recently lost his mother and he had just returned from his native place. And then he came to the point… he asked me for some money as he had not eaten ! It was then that I realised that I had been marked as the target for a new scam. This thought amused me and also alerted me to be on my toes. I walked away from him without saying another word, but I started thinking, “Did I look like a gullible elderly lady who can be easily conned ?” And that brought a smile to my face. Luckily, no damage was done and I decided to be more careful next time.

I have experienced quite a few conmen but so far I have not been conned by them, probably because of my high index of suspicion. I remember a man coming to my clinic in the early days of my practice purporting to be a doctor, telling me that his wife had died in Nanavati and he needed money so that her body could be released. It turned out that he was an alcoholic who tried this trick with quite a few doctors. People asking for money for travelling back home, strangers asking you to show Indian rupees on foreign airports and foreign lands, ladies asking for money for funeral…. We have heard and seen them all, but luckily, our index of suspicion has been pretty high, so the conmen could not fool us.

But many times these guys can be successful and cause a lot of psychological damage to the victim. I remember an old lady in her seventies, who handed over her jewellery to someone claiming to be a police officer and when she realised that she had been conned, she went into severe depression. Many years ago, a close relative was probably hypnotised and gave all the money in his wallet to a stranger. He was in shock for quite some time afterwards. So, it is good to spread the word about the types of frauds that conmen are trying out. But, just as we get smart, they get smarter and in the era of internet, they are getting more and more creative. ( At times, I admire their creativity… of course I can do that only when I’m not taken in by their drama! )

Practising awareness techniques can be very helpful in detecting if someone is trying to fool us.

I pray that all of us can be alert and protect ourselves from these creative conmen,

Love,

Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Yesterday, I came across this quote from Wayne Dyer : “Observe yourself and others in this nutty world and then decide whether to carry around anger or develop a sense of humour that will give you and others one of the most priceless gifts of all—- laughter.” And I could see myself agreeing with this totally.
Many times, I have noticed that when people get together, the most common topics for discussion are how things are going wrong, how corrupt the society is getting, how things were good in olden times and how they are deteriorating day by day…. Once this kind of discussion/ gossip starts, it’s very difficult to put a stop to it. In fact, everyone participates in this mud- throwing game enthusiastically. ( I have often found myself getting carried away by these animated debates). Do these discussions serve any purpose ? Occasionally, some of us do get inspired to do something about changing the situation; but more often than not, it’s just empty talk which creates a lot of negative energy.
If we decide to act as Wayne Dyer says, and look at the situation with humour instead of anger, it has the potential to put us in a better mood. We have tried this out on a number of occasions and it has given us excellent results by turning anger or frustration into positive energy.
One example which I remember vividly took place many years ago. A close family friend had a tendency to preach us all the time and I used to get extremely irritated with him. On one occasion, we were to stay with him in his house. We decided to use the shield of humour to protect ourselves from getting angry and irritable and it worked beautifully. Every time, he said something that was likely to trigger us into anger, we looked at each other and smiled in a knowing way. And it worked wonders ! I still remember that trip because of the humour and the laughter ! And all this without antagonising him in any way !
Isn’t that also what cartoonists do so efficiently and effortlessly ? They highlight the ridiculousness of the situation which makes us laugh. ( And the cartoons also have the potential to galvanise some of us into taking action against the injustice.) And of course, laughter is much much better for our overall health than anger.

So, whenever possible, I have decided to use humour and laughter instead of anger and irritation. What about you?

Hope you can smile and laugh every day,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

I remember listening to an Osho discourse some time back. Amongst other things, he talked about spreading goodwill to others. He emphasised on sending positive vibrations and good wishes even while walking on the road. And you can do this just in your mind. Whenever you meet someone, you can either greet them with oral greetings, or if speech is not possible, just wishing them well in your mind,”भगवान आपका भला करे”. If this is practised by everyone, there can be a positive change in the world. Of course, the first change that takes place is within ourselves, we feel really good when we send शुभ कामनाए to others, we ourselves have a feeling of satisfaction and well being … I have experienced this many times.

In her book’ Magic’, Rhonda Byrne ( author of the famous book ’ The Secret’ ) explains, “Ancient spiritual teachings say that what we give to the other person with a full heart returns to us hundredfold.“ Therefore, if we send शुभ कामनाए or gratitude to others, we will attract the same vibrations of goodwill and gratitude. Wouldn’t the world be a better place to live in if all of us decide to practise this very simple method ?
I try to do it every day, but on many days, I forget about it. So, it’s good to get reminders about this wonderful practice intermittently.

Sending my love and gratitude and best wishes to each and everyone reading these words,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Yesterday, I called our local store for home delivery of some groceries. Normally, whenever I call this store, a cheerful voice answers the phone. He recognises my voice immediately, knows my flat number, takes the order cheerfully and that’s why I feel good when he picks up the phone. I too, can recognise him from his voice and way of talking. When I see him in the store, he is always smiling, ready to help, willing to sort out difficulties. Yesterday, however, a grumpy voice answered the phone. I recognised this person too, from his voice. I could picture him in the store, no smile on his face, not really interested in customers, looking thoroughly bored all the time. I don’t feel like talking to him much on phone or in person. When I was thinking about this, I became conscious of the fact that we can relate so much more easily to someone who is smiling and cheerful. On the other hand, we generally avoid talking to people who are grumpy, who look depressed or seem uninterested in anything.
My sister-in-law who underwent a surgery recently was praising her surgeon… how he is always smiling, how he brightens up the atmosphere with his entry in the room, how he is able to reassure his patients with his smiling countenance.
When someone is bright and cheerful, they transmit their positive vibrations to others just through their presence or even their voice on phone. Obviously, the opposite is also true and grumpy people transmit their negative vibrations through their presence or voice…. And perhaps that’s why people tend to avoid the grumpy ones and reach out for the cheerful ones.
Being happy is an art and I think it’s the most important of all important things in life. Unfortunately, though, none of the schools and colleges have included this subject in their curriculum. So we can learn this art only from the University of life ! And life certainly teaches us this art if we are willing to learn. Once one awakens to the realisation that your time on earth is limited, it becomes easy to master this art. Speaking for myself, when I was presented with the diagnosis of cancer 8 years ago, I started walking on this path; and the journey has really been beautiful. For me, cancer was the biggest teacher …when you are faced with death, you don’t want to waste your time feeling anything but happy and cheerful.
Of course, there are days when I stray away from the path, but invariably I am able to return to it.
I hope that all of us are surrounded by souls trying to master this art of Being happy,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends
At the moment, I am re-reading the book “The Path of Emancipation” by the Vietnamese Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh. These are talks given at a 21-Day Mindfulness Retreat at Vermont. Here, he has talked a lot about mindful breathing and mindful walking. He says, “When we practise mindful walking, every step we take is like placing a seal on the ground……. We print our solidity, peace, and freedom on the ground”. I have experienced mindful breathing and mindful walking in meditation camps ( also called as Vipassana and vipassana walks.) So I knew first hand that this kind of mindful walking can bring you a lot of peace and relaxation, but I was not really sure that you could put this into practice in your day-to-day life, especially when you are doing multiple chores on a busy road. But life has its own way of teaching you lessons that you need to learn and I experienced this the very next day.
The next day, I was walking to my bank in a hurry as I had a lot of chores that day. The road to the bank is narrow, full of traffic, with hardly any place for pedestrians to walk. I was soon brought to a halt as an elderly man was walking very slowly in front of me. It was not possible to overtake him, and this is the time one usually gets anxious and frustrated. Luckily, for me, I remembered Thich Nhat Hanh’s teachings about mindful walking and decided to put them into practice. As it is, I had to walk slowly, so why not try this mindful walking, even though I am on a busy road? And no sooner I started walking mindfully, I realised the truth of what Thich Nhat Hanh was saying. As I took each step mindfully, I found myself filled with peace and relaxation and it did not seem very long before I was at the doorstep of the bank.
Once I finished my work in the bank, I was back on the road, walking at my normal pace. But life had certainly decided to teach me about mindful walking on that day. Because within a few minutes I was walking on a road where a school had just left. The entire road was lined up with school buses and children queueing up to get inside the school bus and obviously I had to slow down once again, and got another opportunity to practice mindful walking. Before I reached home, I could practice this wonderful technique two more times: once, when an elderly lady was walking, very slowly in front of me with her 3-4 years old grandchild and another time when a limping lady blocked my path. And every time, I could feel the Peace and Relaxation permeating my being, during those few moments that I practised mindful walking. So, now I understand that you can practise mindful walking, even on a busy road, even when you have a lot of chores to do, and when you practise it, within a few minutes, you can feel peace and relaxation descend upon you and fill you and surround you.
If we really want to practise mindfulness, we can get hundreds of opportunities every day to practise either mindful breathing or mindful walking —— when you are stuck in traffic, and can’t do anything about it, when you cannot walk fast on a busy road, or on an escalator, when you’re waiting for a bus, or a train or your taxi to arrive, when you are waiting for your loved ones to return home—— normally we become impatient or anxious during these times, but actually these moments can be converted into an opportunity to put into practice mindful breathing and walking. Would you like to try this out the next time you’re stuck in traffic?

I hope that I remember to practise mindful breathing and mindful walking every time I am waiting,
Love,
Anjali, Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends
The new metro line from Gundavli to Andheri West via Dahisar East is a boon to us. We can avoid the traffic jams, the bad roads and pollution while travelling by the air conditioned and super clean Metro. As the Metro travels at a higher level, you can get a wonderful view of the city while travelling. Of course, the view majorly consist of buildings, high-rises, interspersed with slums. But from the stations Jogeshwari East to Aarey or Dindoshi, we can see a wonderful lush green carpet of trees. This area, especially around Aarey Road, still boasts of a lot of trees which probably serve as the lungs of the suburbs. However, once you cross Dindoshi, we are back to tall towers, the green jungle giving way to a concrete jungle.
In this patch of the city around Aarey, you can actually feel a positive difference in the air that you’re breathing in. If you’re travelling by an auto early in the morning, before sunrise, then this particular patch is much much cooler than the rest of the suburbs.
As I sat in the Metro, watching the scenery unfold before my eyes, I remembered a car ride many years ago when my son was in the first or second standard. We were caught in a traffic jam on our way to Dahisar from Andheri. As it was obvious that it would take a long time for our journey, I decided to play a game of “Count the trees“ with Satyajit. As it was April and Gulmohars were in blossom, we decided to count the number of Gulmohars on both sides of the highway. The bright red or orange colour of the blossoms made it easy to spot the trees, even from a distance. To my amazement, we counted more than a hundred Gulmohar trees during this journey. A couple of years ago, ( once again in April ) both Satyajit and I remembered this car ride and tried to look for the Gulmohar trees but found to our dismay that the number had dwindled considerably.
We had a similar experience while travelling from Nashik to Saputara many years ago. As it was a long journey, once again, we had spent the time counting the Banyan trees lining both sides of the road. Once again, the number was in hundreds. About 10 years later, when we travelled the road again, the road had been widened, and most of the Banyan trees had been sacrificed during the widening.
These days, we are hearing a lot about the air quality of Mumbai going down remarkably,it seems it’s even worse than the air quality of Delhi. We can actually see the smog in the mornings, all the more striking when you watch it from the Metro. And we also find that the temperatures in the city and suburbs are reaching higher levels every year. I am sure that these adverse changes in my beloved city can be attributed not just to the increasing constructions and the exponential increase in the number of vehicles but also to the drastic reduction in the number of trees.

I do hope that we can change this situation for the better by planting more trees and making changes in the legislation,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

After reading my post about trees yesterday, my brother-in-law Dheeraj wrote to me from London, ”I spotted something wonderful in my old neighbourhood in London.
A friend of mine was spotted watering two street side trees.When inquired, he told me that he had adopted these trees under a new program our local council has implemented. Since he is a permanent resident there, he will look after the trees for a few years until they can look after themselves. I wonder if something similar is possible in India?
If each family adopts one tree and looks after it’s wellbeing fully, in a very short time, the green cover would increase. Space being an issue, I have known for the longest time another dear friend whose botanist father successfully experimented growing large trees on building terraces in 9 inches deep beds. They have a forest on their terrace in the busy area of Law College Road, Pune.”

This ‘Adopting a tree’ sounds like a very good idea. I am not aware if it is already implemented in India in any of the cities. If not, it would be a great initiative, especially if taken up by large societies as well as corporates as part of CSR activities.

About the terrace gardens, I know a dear friend who cultivates a large garden with many trees on her terrace. The family works quite hard to maintain the trees but the results are amazing.

I am a member of a Japanese spiritual organisation. Our Spiritual leader has been advocating growing at least one plant in each home for many years now.

I have noticed that these days, many institutions gift potted plants to their speakers/ guests as a token of appreciation instead of other gifts. This trend is picking up quite well and would be helpful for the go green initiative.

In some of the birthday parties or other events, I have received seeds as gifts, which when planted, blossom into lovely plants…. these are beautiful Eco friendly gifts which will not end up in trash.

So, conscientious people are trying their best to spread the word about planting more trees and conserving the environment.

I hope all of us can lend a helping hand in this initiative,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Have you ever hugged a tree ?
And put an ear to the tree’s trunk to listen to the mysterious sounds in the interior of the tree ?
My son taught me to do that when he was in kindergarten. In those golden days, we three would visit छोटा काश्मिर, the beautiful garden on Aarey road at least 2-3 times in a month. Sometimes, my niece, who is a little older than my son, would accompany us. This garden is located in the heart of the green forest of Aarey and has beautiful trees, lush green lawns and a lot of open space. There was a Bakul tree in the middle of the garden which all of us loved. Satyajit and Tanaya would climb up the tree and we both would sit down on the seats under the tree, inhaling the fragrance of the flowers and the smell of the trees, away from the hustle bustle of the busy city and relaxing completely. It used to be one of the most peaceful times that we spent together in the company of nature.
Before heading back home, we would take a walk around the entire garden. One day, while we were walking in an area where there were many coconut trees, Satyajit hugged a tree , putting his ear to the trunk and then he beckoned us, asking us to listen to the mysterious sound in the tree. When we followed suit, we could hear a musical murmuring sound coming from the interior of the tree. When we asked Satyajit about the origin of the sound, he said…. Remember he was in kindergarten at that time….,” It is the sound of the water going from the roots to the branches. “ We both loved this poetic explanation !
And that’s how I learned to hug a tree and enjoy the music inside a tree!

I do hope you too get an opportunity to bask in the glory of nature and hug trees,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

While we are talking about the trees, the go green revolution and environmental conservation, I remembered hearing this from an Osho discourse. He says,
“You are a guest. Leave this earth a little more beautiful, a little more human, a little more lovable, a little more fragrant, for those unknown guests who will be following you.”

And these guests following us are none other than our own descendants. We always worry about how much money we can leave to our children and grandchildren, what material possessions can be handed over to them after we are gone; but we ignore the most important and precious treasure that we can preserve for generations and that is our Mother Earth.

I have heard a story about an आदिवासी
( aboriginal or tribal ) chief. He was approached by a company and offered a lot of wealth in exchange of certain land. He thought about it and refused the offer. When asked why he was refusing such a seemingly lucrative offer, he replied that as a chief he has to think about the consequences of his actions not just in the near future, but for the next 7 generations; and this particular offer was not beneficial for his tribe in the long run, in fact it would be harmful for his descendants.

I hope that the modern materialist world can learn this important lesson from the so-called backward tribes,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Recently, I came across a quote , ”A flower does not compare itself to the one beside it, it simply blooms.”
Actually, all of us are like flowers, we can all bloom when the right time comes, when the right atmosphere surrounds us, when we are ready for blooming; the only hindrance is when we compare ourselves with others. Comparison and the envy or jealousy which may at times follow the comparison can work as a poison for the flower within us.( At times, of course, comparison can motivate us to do better too ). If each and everyone of us is reassured that each one is unique, each one has a special place in the universe and each one matters; then it is easier to stop comparing and be content with the stage of development that you are currently in.
As I was thinking about all this, I remembered another post which I had read. It said,
“Someone will always be prettier, someone with always be smarter, someone will always be younger,
but they will never be YOU.”
This aptly sums up the situation, doesn’t it ?
YOU are always unique…एकमेव अद्वितीय… in the entire universe, there has been no person exactly like you, never in the entire history of mankind. Each person has different strengths and different weaknesses, each person blossoms at a different time, each one has a different destiny, but nevertheless, each one is equally important.

As Osho says, “Nobody is superior, nobody is inferior, but nobody is equal either. People are simply unique, incomparable. You are you, I am I. I have to contribute my potential to life; you have to contribute your potential to life. I have to discover my own being; you have to discover your own being.”

I hope that all of us can contribute our potential to life and work towards discovering our own being,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

We doctors take an oath before we actually start medical practice. This oath is known as the ‘Hippocratic oath’, a promise to uphold the professional ethics of practising medicine. Hippocrates is known as “ The Father of Medicine “ for his lasting contributions to medicine. But I am not going to talk about the Hippocratic oath today. ( I heard that there is some controversy about this oath now in India ! ) I want to talk about an interesting quote from Hippocrates that I read today. He says, “ Before you heal someone, ask him if he is willing to give up the things that made him sick.“

Hippocrates was born around 460 BC, almost 2500 years ago. But his quote holds true even today after so many years, in spite of the mind boggling advances in the medical field. In fact, probably, it is even more true now in the modern times with the ever increasing lifestyle diseases than it was in his times. Don’t we all see this happening day in and day out ? After a bypass surgery, for a few months or a couple of years at the most, the patient follows the advice regarding lifestyle changes, but soon, very soon, it’s back to square one ! We hear of people undergoing 2 or 3 bypass surgeries, of diabetes not getting under control, and so on, simply because the patients are not willing to give up the lifestyle that made them sick. Is it not time that the doctors asked the patient this fundamental question before treatment is started, “ Are you willing to make a change? Are you willing to give up the things that make you sick ?”

And all this is not just about diet and exercise, but it’s also about the stresses of modern life. Unless we consciously work on reducing our stress levels, on spending some time every day indulging in activities that relax us ( like our hobbies ) and of course, unless we take up the practice of meditation on a regular basis, it would be difficult to reduce our stress levels.
I heard a very interesting talk by BK Shivani yesterday on you tube. This talk was given specifically for doctors at a medical conference. She has talked about the origin of sickness being related to negative thoughts and how sickness cannot be cured unless we treat the root cause. But more about that some other time.

I wish that all of us can make a conscious choice to give up the things that make us sick, and work towards staying healthy,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends
A few days ago, we were shooting for our YouTube channel’s series “Wise Parenting “. The topic for discussion was “Temper tantrums in children“. Our son, Satyajit , is doing the job of a director, videographer,editor and the media person……in fact, he is सर्वेसर्वा ( all in all ) for the shoots. We were discussing about the difference between needs and wants of children, about how the parents should not give in to the wants ( wants are just that…. something that the child wants, mostly a toy or a food item) ; but how you should be addressing the needs of young children. ( Needs are things that children need for their emotional development, like love and care and attention and appreciation; but children don’t really ask for them ). While this discussion was going on, a point came up that some children ask for things just to try it out ….if they get what they ask for, that’s fine and if they don’t get it, then too, it is alright. Satyajit confessed to us that he used to try out this behaviour in his childhood. He was inspired by an ad which advocated the thinking , “पूछने में क्या जाता है ? “ ( What’s the harm in asking? )
We had a hearty laugh when we heard this, and I thought that it’s a good policy to follow for anyone as long as we don’t feel insulted if someone says no. Basically, not getting attached to the outcome, enjoying it when you get a positive result, but not getting angry or upset at a negative response.
Later when I was thinking about this policy of, ”पूछने में क्या जाता है ? “, I started wondering about the things that we as adults ask for. Most of the people when they pray to God, ask for something or the other. Mostly these are materialistic things ….maybe a good job, a better house, more money or something similar. Aren’t these similar to the wants of children? Just like children, we hardly ever ask for the things that we really need like maybe good health, or the higher spiritual values. When we pray and want to ask for something, should we ask for our materialistic wants or some eternal needs. … like spiritual awakening or eternal values like the ability to be accepting, humble and grateful, to be satisfied, learning compassion, be loving, to offer service without expectations….. all these are actually the basic needs of all human beings, but we hardly ever ask for them.

If we were to follow the policy of “पूछने में क्या जाता है ?“, why not ask for our real needs and not our wants ? What do you think ?
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

“Is it okay to get bored ?” That was the question asked by one of the parents in the Parent-Teacher Meeting of my son’s kindergarten class. She was obviously asking about her child. She further added that at times, her child looks bored, but is not interested in any activity that she suggests. She wanted to know what she should be doing at such times. The teacher was an experienced one, having worked with kindergarten children for many years and she told us that it’s perfectly okay for a child to get bored occasionally. In fact, such times, when the child’s brain and mind are rested, may lead to creative activities later on.
In the era of joint families, this question of whether the child is getting bored or not did not arise at all. Most of the times the mother was very busy looking after the housework, but then there was always someone or the other to take care of the child…maybe an older sibling,maybe grandparents, or aunts or uncles. In the modern times however, many parents don’t have much help with child rearing except hired helps. Also the anxiety levels of parents are higher, probably because they have no support ,so they are often wondering whether they are going in the right direction with regard to bringing up their child. And that’s why such questions arise in the minds of parents these days. The internet or the social media can only add to the confusion.
Many times we as doctors see that parents want their child to be busy all the time. They don’t want their child to ‘waste’ even a single moment of the day. And if it’s a single child, the expectation scale starts even higher. We see many parents enrolling their children in classes from a very young age.
Actually, the truth is that the young children, of kindergarten age, need a lot of unstructured play. Structured activities should not happen more than a few minutes at a stretch. The unstructured play time is the time when the child’s creativity is at a peak and that is very important for later development. I met a mother once who complained that her child plays only with leaves and flowers and mud when she goes to play with her friends. The mother wanted to know what she could do to change this pattern. I had a tough time explaining to her that this is exactly what the child needed to do at her age… the feel of the natural elements in her hands, the exposure to various colours and textures was crucial to the sensory development of her child.
And that’s why it’s perfectly fine if the child is bored occasionally. There is no need for the parents to feel guilty. The boredom may be the seed for subsequent creativity !
While we are talking of boredom in children, what about boredom in adults ? Many adults also feel that they should be busy all the time, they should not be wasting a single moment of their waking hours. Is it okay for adults too to get bored occasionally ?( I am not talking of someone who is bored all the time )

Let me quote Osho here: he says ,”We are constantly drilled with the aphorism,’Don’t just stand there – do something! Yet, Buddha would say, ‘Don’t just do something – stand there!’ “He further says,
“ ‘Sitting silently, doing nothing, the spring comes and the grass grows by itself.’ It is only out of silence that action arises.“

So, even with adults, we need to rest our overworked brains intermittently. It’s ok to get bored occasionally… that will only make you more productive later!

I hope you are ready to explore this art of ‘sitting silently, doing nothing’ !
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

I came across this thought provoking quote a few days ago: ‘So often we are depressed by what remains to be done and forget to be thankful for all that has been done.’
How true this is, especially for perfectionists and obsessive people!
And this can happen on a daily basis, especially at night before sleeping, when we take a stock of the whole day. Some of us tend to remember the unfinished jobs and start cursing ourselves for being lazy. But we don’t acknowledge the work that we did well during the day, we forget about the successful completion of many tasks that needed hard work. In short, we focus on our deficiencies but take for granted our efficiency!
Actually, when we talk about reflections, it should be about both our strengths and our weaknesses. Unfortunately, most of us focus on our deficiencies rather than our successes. The major problem with this approach occurs if we are following this pattern every night. If we sleep with these negative thoughts about ourselves in our mind, during our sleep, this negativity can penetrate into our subconscious and when this pattern is repeated often, it can affect our self esteem and confidence. We may start thinking of ourselves as failures if we keep harbouring such thoughts regularly. The negative thoughts act as a seed and slowly, a poisonous tree, which is harmful to us, starts thriving in our minds.
BK Shivani didi talks a lot about watching our thoughts at night and advises that the last thing we do before going to sleep should be the regular practice of positive thoughts and positive affirmations. ( Osho too, has given a meditation called the ‘Affirmation meditation’. ) When we practise these positive Affirmations on a daily basis, we can sow the seeds of a wonderful tree that blossoms and nourishes us. If we are sincere about following this practice regularly, then our productivity, our capacity to work, our stamina, our self esteem and confidence can all grow stronger.

I have been following a daily night practice given to us by our spiritual leader. In this practice, before going to bed, you are asked to look at yourself in the mirror, give yourself a big smile and congratulate yourself on completing the tasks that you attended to throughout the day.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that you ignore your faults or failures. It just means that especially at night, the focus should be on your achievements. ( In case you become aware of some unfinished tasks, you can motivate yourself to do even better the next day. )

I hope all of us can start this wonderful nightly practice,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Yesterday, I was talking about appreciating ourselves before going to sleep. As I wrote about this, I realised that just as we focus on our own deficiencies and faults, we tend to do that with others too. Very often, we take the good behaviour or good actions of others for granted, and fail to appreciate the good deeds that others are doing. This can happen, not just with our family members, but also with our friends, our neighbours and especially with those who are working for us. And parents do it all the time with their children !

As a Paediatrician, I have to often guide parents about how to nurture the emotional development of children; and one of the important aspects of parenting is to know the importance of appreciating children’s behaviour. Parents often neglect to or do not understand the need to appreciate desirable behaviour of their child but they are quick in pointing out the undesirable behaviour. ( Of course, this happens all the time with respect to adults too ! ). We know that praising a particular behaviour has the potential to motivate the child to repeat the behaviour, i.e. positive reinforcement. It is more beneficial to use positive reinforcement as opposed to negative reinforcement both in children and in adults. I believe that though most adults are grown up in physical aspects, they still remain children at heart ( including myself! )That’s why the practice of appreciating good behaviour works equally well with adults just as it does with children. Speaking for myself, I always feel motivated to work harder when someone acknowledges and appreciates my efforts.

In our spiritual organisation, we are taught that it is important to acknowledge the contribution/ help of others in any work, even when their contribution is minor. This can encourage them to do even better in future.
So, all in all, appreciating others is as important as appreciating ourselves. These days, whenever I find an auto or taxi driver who drives carefully and safely, I make sure to compliment him on his driving while getting off. Invariably, this brings a smile to his face and I am convinced that he drives even better in his next rides. Once we realise the importance of appreciation, we can find innumerable opportunities every day to put it into practice: when someone makes a cup of tea for you, when someone cooks food for you, when someone cleans for you, when someone takes care of your children, when someone cares for your parents…. the list is endless….even when someone smiles at you and makes your day ! Many times, if I cannot actually thank the person in person, I thank them in my mind and I am certain that these vibrations reach them.

So, are you ready to add on this practice of appreciating others to the nightly practice of appreciating yourself ?
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends
A few days ago, I had called the personal number of the person in charge of an institution for some important information. I knew this lady, had met her on a number of occasions and had found her to be a very pleasant, cooperative and helpful person. Therefore, I was surprised to hear a gruff voice answering the phone. It sounded as if the person answering the phone was not really interested in answering, sent out the vibrations of ‘why is this person calling me ?’ and was in general, not very inviting. So I asked to speak to the person I knew. I realised with a jolt that the same lady was answering the phone. I then introduced myself and she remembered me and immediately there was a radical change in her tone. She was once again, the pleasant and helpful person that I knew. She helped me with all the information, invited me to visit their institution again and we ended the conversation on a pleasant note. After I kept the phone down, I was wondering about this phenomenon and I realised that I myself am often guilty of a similar behaviour. Having answered many unsolicited calls from people promoting their products at odd hours, many times, I am weary of answering unknown numbers. And when I do answer these phones, I do so curtly. If the person calling is selling some product that I do not want, my tone remains the same. But if it’s a friend or an acquaintance, then immediately my tone is different, more interested and friendly. I am sure this happens with most of us, especially when we are irritable or overworked or anxious or worried about something. We always project our own vibrations when we answer the phone. So, if we are happy and relaxed, we may answer in a cheerful tone; but if we are stressed out due to any reason, our stress is reflected in our tone. As I thought about this incident, I remembered reading a book by Ekhart Tolle. He has talked about the exact phenomena of answering phone calls in this book. And he suggests that before picking up the phone, especially if you are irritable or angry, take a pause, breathe in and out deeply a few times, and then answer the phone. This pause and breathing gives you time to change your vibrations and your tone. As you become more aware, your tone becomes at least neutral, if not a cheerful one. I have tried this practice quite a few times, and it does work wonders. However, I have a tendency to forget about this as time passes by. I am happy that listening to the change in the tone of this person reminded me about the pause before answering a phone call. Now, once again, I will make efforts to take a pause before answering any phone calls, and try to answer them mindfully.

I hope I can incorporate this mindfulness in every action that I take,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawadekar

Good morning friends

Today’s Mandala is for the puzzle lovers. A six letter word is hidden in this Mandala. The letters are jumbled up. Please find the word if you like puzzles. Or else, wait until tomorrow for the answer.
A few hints about the word:
1. This thing is precious to all of us irrespective of class, creed, religion or race.
2. The first and the last letters of this 6-letter word are the same.
3. The second to fifth letters, when rearranged, tell a story!
Happy hunting !
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

As many of you guessed correctly, the golden word hidden in yesterday’s Mandala was ‘Health’ ! Congratulations to everyone who has found true health !

The WHO states: “Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.” As this definition states, true health is not confined to just physical well-being, but includes mental and social wellness too.

We all know that the body and mind are closely related. Actually speaking, body and mind are not two separate compartments, but they are along the same continuum; the body being the gross visible ( स्थूल शरीर ) and the mind being the subtle/ invisible one (सूक्ष्म शरीर )That’s why, a physical illness can cause a psychological disturbance and conversely, a mental disorder can lead to some physical problems. Scientific studies suggest that negative emotions like depression, severe anxiety, worry and stress can adversely affect the recovery from an illness and also our immune system. Depression and anxiety have also been linked with the cause and/ or relapse of cancers. Social factors also influence the physical and mental state of an individual.

We doctors always talk about ‘Prevention being better than cure’ for any health issues. So, we stress upon the importance of a good nutritive diet, regular exercise and a good lifestyle. In these stressful modern times, taking time out of our busy schedules for relaxation, for pursuing our hobbies is as, or maybe, even more important than diet and exercise.

While we talk about these aspects of health, we are forgetting an important component of ourselves and that is the spiritual aspect. I am sure many of us have experienced this unseen realm- the spiritual- which is beyond both the body and the mind. It is a matter of experience and not logic ( hence a matter of great controversy ) Our body, mind and soul are interconnected and any change in any of these three components can affect the other two, both positively or negatively. A person who is physically healthy, has no obvious mental problems, may not be truly healthy if spiritually he/ she is harbouring harmful emotions. For example, people who are always angry, always complaining, consistently blaming others, jealous or revengeful, who harbour harmful thoughts for others like hatred, all these people are obviously not healthy spiritually. On the other hand, people who are loving and caring, kind, compassionate, helpful, satisfied with their life situation are spiritually healthier. In the long run, a spiritually unhealthy person is more likely to suffer from physical illness also. It follows that staying spiritually healthy during a stressful period can help reduce the duration of sickness or its complications. Prayers and spiritual practices are known to improve recovery from major health issues, but often these are termed as ‘miracles’ by the medical fraternity. Actually, we need more scientific studies to assess the role of spirituality during stressful situations.

Speaking for myself, I have experienced the benefits from meditation and other spiritual practices during my cancer treatment. After my treatment was over, I have helped some cancer patients with these practices and the results have been amazing.

But even if you leave aside major health issues ( like cancer ), meditation has been known to control hypertension, diabetes and anxiety disorders. So, I believe that being open to spiritual experiences , and not writing them off as an aberration, is the need of the modern world.

When I read the word ‘healthy’ , I think it is an abbreviation of ‘Heal thyself ‘ ! After all, remaining healthy and/ or healing ourselves is quite often in our own hands, isn’t it ? And to remain healthy in the true sense, we need to take care of not just our body and mind but our spiritual aspects too !

Wishing all of us good physical, mental, social and spiritual health in the years to come,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Yesterday, I was writing about the importance of spiritual practices in health and healing. I would like to share our own personal experience in this respect.
My husband Manoj, who is a Psychiatrist, suffered from severe rheumatoid arthritis more than 25 years ago. Rheumatoid arthritis is an extremely painful condition, affecting several joints and also other parts of the body. Manoj had involvement of most of the major joints, making simple tasks like getting up from bed , brushing his teeth, walking up and down the stairs extremely painful and difficult. In addition, he developed allergies to multiple foods during this time. All in all, it was a very difficult time for us as a family.
After almost a year of this suffering, with no end in sight, Manoj decided to attend a meditation camp along with his music guru Pandit Yashwant Deo. The aim of going for this camp was just to experience a change. We were not looking for any cure. At that time, Manoj used to have bandages on most of his joints, was in severe pain when the action of painkillers wore off and could not eat more than half the food items due to allergies. We travelled for almost 10 hours to reach Ganapatipule where the camp was being conducted. And the first session that we attended was Satsung, in which everyone was dancing enthusiastically. We were not really prepared for this kind of activity, especially with Manoj’s joint condition and seriously thought of going back home. But then Manoj decided that as we have come so far, let us at least give it a try. So, we stayed on and tried to practise the meditation techniques to the best of our abilities. And on the third day, we were pleasantly surprised when we realised that Manoj had missed a dose of his painkillers and still there was no pain! At home, delaying the dose of his medicine even by an hour would lead to excruciating pain. And here we were, 5-6 hours after missing a dose, with no pain at all ! That was when we realised the power of meditation. Manoj and I continued to meditate regularly after returning home and we found a great positive change in his condition. Slowly, we could taper off his medicines, most of his allergies disappeared and he could resume normal life once again. And till date, after 25 years, there has been no relapse. Manoj has been conducting meditation camps regularly for many years now and many people have benefited from these camps. We also conduct meditation sessions in our clinic regularly. He has written about this journey in a Marathi book ‘एका पुनर्जन्माची कथा’. A lot of his readers have been inspired to meditate after reading his book and have had wonderful experiences.
During my own cancer treatment almost 9 years ago, meditation and another spiritual practice ( we are members of a Japanese spiritual organisation) was extremely helpful to me to stay calm and cheerful throughout the 6 month period of treatment.
Rheumatoid arthritis is an autoimmune condition in which patient’s own body wages a war against various body parts. Cancer too, has been linked to certain problems with the immune system. Meditation can certainly improve the working of our immune system, thereby improving our overall health.
We have personally experienced the wonderful benefits of meditation especially during the early days of Manoj’s RA, when we would find that there was pain relief and improvement in the range of movements in the affected joints after a meditation session.
We have also experienced reduction in the doses of strong painkillers like morphine in terminal cancer patients with other spiritual practices apart from meditation.

So combining spiritual practices with regular medical therapy sounds like a good idea in case of major health issues, doesn’t it ?

I hope that meditation and other spiritual practices can be routinely used in serious health problems as an adjunct to medical treatment.
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

I remember reading somewhere, “Every time you get upset at something, ask yourself if you were to die tomorrow, was it worth wasting your time getting angry”. Unfortunately, we often forget to ask ourselves this question when we are angry. We are so much carried away by the energy of the anger; by the feeling, nay, conviction, that we are right and the other person is wrong, that we totally ignore this truth even if we remember it. I am no exception to this human tendency. Very often, we waste our energy in getting angry about minor issues, which, in the long run, have no importance. But if we forget about this and allow ourselves to be consumed by the anger, we say or do things that can have a long lasting negative impact and it can even harm our relationships with our loved ones.

If we seriously consider the fact which Osho always stresses upon, “ Death is just round the corner! “, then would we waste time in anger? Or would we choose to forgive the mistakes of others ( and also ourselves ) and focus on spending time in love and harmony ?

Of course, this is true only for those situations which will not be of any importance over a period of time. In certain circumstances, which have long term implications, we may consciously choose to show our anger or dissatisfaction, but then, that will be a conscious decision, so we can choose our words and actions carefully and not get hijacked by the anger.

In the early days of my cancer diagnosis, it was very easy for me to follow this advice, because with a diagnosis like cancer, you never know how many days you have left. So you tend to concentrate on the intrinsic values like love and harmony and tend to ignore the differences of opinions with others. As time has passed however, I no more have this feeling of death being round the corner, and I find that I have to remind myself about the truth of this advice. But following a spiritual practice on a regular basis can be really helpful in reminding yourself about this valuable advice. When you practise meditation or any other spiritual practice regularly, even when you get angry, it is easier to let go of the anger, in a shorter time. Spiritual gurus generally advise that you should resolve your differences, especially with your loved ones, before you go to sleep or before you step out of the house; because you never know what can happen during sleep or when you are away from your loved ones.

I hope that we can remember this valuable advice during our disagreements and learn to resolve our differences before going to sleep.

Love,

Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

On Saturday, we both visited the ‘ Divya kala mela ‘ at MMRD Grounds at BKC. This exhibition showcases the artworks and other products like food items from persons with disabilities. It is an initiative by the Department of empowerment of persons with disabilities. We wanted to have a look at the exhibition as 2 of our friends have stalls here.

Swasti Mehta, ( our friend’s daughter) has Down’s syndrome and is a special child ( now an adult if you count her age ). She is an entrepreneur who sells a drink called Pudina Punch. The taste of this Pudina Punch is amazing and once you taste it, you can forget about all other drinks and stick to it whenever you feel like a drink. Apart from her Pudina Punch, Swasti is a fantastic person, always smiling and welcoming you to her stall, appealing to you to taste her Punch, even if you don’t buy or order it ! She is a wonderful salesperson, also advertising the sugar-free cookies of Varun Sawant who shares her stall numbered 16. Varun has Autism and he is passionate about baking. In spite of his handicap, he has completed the hotel management course and started his own business of cookies using jowar or nachni with jaggery. They are very tasty and I could not stop myself from buying them. Apart from baking, Varun is also a long distance runner, taking part in marathons. As we talked to Varun’s mother, she expressed her gratitude to the doctors and occupational therapists who guided them about alternative choices of education ( NIOS ) which helped Varun tremendously.

Another NGO, the Awakening Charitable Trust, based in Ratnagiri, has a stall in this exhibition. The founders and Trustees , Shamin and Shashvat Shere are close friends and we have observed up-close their dedication about empowering people with disabilities. Their NGO creates purses with traditional warli designs and also other items like bedsheets, coasters, table mats and other gift items.

Another stall which caught our attention because of the peaceful vibes emanating from the stall, had an artist from Manipur, creating a beautiful collage work. His creations are lovely and worth decorating our walls with. I’m sorry to say that I don’t have his name or stall number, but the exhibition is not huge, so you should be able to find him easily.
Another stall had wooden artwork and we actually saw the artisan sculpting his creations on wooden frames. Some of these resembled the Japanese dragon deities.

One more interesting stall ‘ Ecomade’ was selling bio degradable pens , made of paper. Only the refill is made of plastic. An interesting concept of this pen is that after the refill is over, you can remove it and plant the paper covering in soil. It contains a seed at the bottom and can grow into a lovely plant. I am waiting for my pens to be used completely, so that I can plant them and grow the plants.

There are also many other stalls selling handicrafts and food items and clothing. We could buy biodegradable plates and bowls from another stall.

Generally, when there’s an exhibition of persons with disabilities, most of the visitors have a lot of sympathy for them and have a subconscious attitude that they are helping someone who needs help. Many times we also have a feeling that we are doing them a favour by buying things from them. I used to have a similar attitude earlier. But now that I have known Swasti and her family very closely for many years,I know that the reality is absolutely different. Rather than doing a favour to them, I am being benefited tremendously when I come into contact with them. There’s so much to learn from them and their families: their grit and determination, their positive attitude towards life, their incessant efforts to overcome the obstacles with a smile on their face…. I learn all this and much more from them. And when I see them heroically facing the challenges of life, I feel ashamed to complain about any deficiencies in my own life.

With respect to Swasti, I always find her smiling and enthusiastic and moreover, she is always in the present …not in the past or the future! ( which is what meditation is all about ! ) She is mature beyond her intellectual age.

As I was talking to Darshana ( Swasti’s mother ) , I came to understand that this exhibition is a wonderful initiative by the government to give opportunities to persons with disabilities. The stalls are free, food is provided for them, travel expenses are reimbursed and accommodation is arranged for those from outside Mumbai. There still are a few lacunae, but I am sure that they will be sorted out eventually. The government is planning to hold such exhibitions in 4 major cities.

The exhibition is on till 25th February from 11 am to 9 pm. Do visit it not just to buy things, but to experience the wonderful atmosphere, and to meet in person the shining live examples of families standing up to the challenges of life and winning !
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

As I was writing about persons with disabilities yesterday, I thought of another group with a disorder which affects all the modalities of their life. For the last 30 years, I have been working with JDF, Juvenile Diabetes Foundation, a support group for JDs, as we call them, providing medical, psychological and social support to JDs and their families. The age group of our member JDs ranges from 10 months to 70 years. Let me first explain what it means to be a JD. A Juvenile or Type 1 diabetic, is one whose body cannot produce insulin. So a JD has to take 4-5 insulin injections every day ( or use an insulin pump). Oral tablets are of no use for this type of diabetes. In addition to the insulin injections, they have to check their blood sugar multiple times a day, do periodic tests, take care to eat nutritive, healthy meals and exercise regularly. Of course, the stresses of modern life get multiplied with all these factors. One would then expect them to be down in the dumps, but we see a totally different picture when we interact with them. Most of the JDs are very happy, focused in life and more mature than peers of their own age. In fact, in our 3-day residential camps every year, we doctors get energised by their company, when we spend time teaching them during the day and being entertained by them in the evening.

Just as I talked about people with disabilities, there’s a lot to learn from our family of JDs. I vividly remember the time more than 25 years ago when we had received Manoj’s RA test report and we were emotionally quite low with the confirmation of the diagnosis. Around the same time, we had a JDF get-together and our doctor colleagues insisted that we attend the program. And I am so glad that we listened to them and participated in the party. Just being around these JDs and their families was like a great boost for us emotionally. Their energy and enthusiasm was infectious and for a few hours, we forgot all our woes. Not only that, we carried this powerful positivity home and it helped us come to terms with the diagnosis of RA.

Sometimes I feel that those who face obstacles of different kinds in their life are more motivated to work hard than those who have everything handed over to them on a silver or golden plate. So, those who have physical problems of any kind, those with chronic health issues, those with financial hardship or those with emotional problems in the family tend to work very hard to overcome their problems. Those who have had an easy or smooth life are at times ( not always of course ) laid back and are not motivated to go beyond routine. Unless and until we face a difficulty or a setback, we don’t realise the extent of our coping capacity. All of us have a tremendous store of untapped potential with us. When we have a very easy life, without any problems, this potential remains hidden and we may lead mediocre lives ( unless we are motivated from within, needing no external stimulus ! ). For the majority of people, difficult times can bring to the forefront hitherto unknown and unexpected strengths, if we face the challenges with the right attitude. In these cases, not only do we reach the top shining, but we can also become an inspiration and a role model for others.

And that’s why I am especially grateful to the rough times that our family has had to endure, because those were the times when we knew our real strength !

I hope all of us can tap our hidden potential,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Today morning I was listening to a talk by BK Shivani didi about selfcare. One important point caught my attention and set me thinking. She said that many times we hold grudges against people saying, ‘ How could that person behave like this with me ? I can never forget this. ‘ Of course, this kind of thinking means that we are holding on to these negative emotions and thoughts like grudges and anger and hatred ( She did not even utter this word, but I inferred it from her talk ! ) She explained that when we hold on to this negativity, it causes a lot of harm. And the first thing that is harmed is our own self. If our mind cannot let go of the behaviour of others and continues to harbour these harmful thoughts, first our body is affected and over the years, we suffer from illnesses. Obviously, these negative vibes also affect our near ones, our family and friends, the circle of people that we move in , and they can also adversely affect our city and country and the whole world too if everybody persists in this kind of thinking.

As I listened to her, a very interesting point caught my attention. I thought of the times when I had been hurt by someone’s behaviour. Our natural reaction in such situations is to blame the other person, to wonder’ how can this person behave so horribly with me ‘and to never forget the hurt and the pain and suffering associated with this situation. While we do this however, we do not remember the times when this person had helped us, we forget the occasions when we had wonderful times together and we just focus on the hurt. We find it difficult to let go of the bad behaviour but we choose to easily forget the good behaviour. Of course, this is human tendency and it happens everywhere and with everyone. More often than not, we vividly remember the bad behaviour of a friend or relative, but easily forget that the same person had behaved well 9 times out of 10 ! And when we send these negative vibrations of hurt and anger to this person, they are going to come back to us with a vehemence. And so it continues !

I do hope that all of can let go of grudges against others and hold on to their good deeds. ( Instead of doing the opposite as we often do ! )
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Rumi says, “ Let people catch something from your heart that will cause no discomfort, but help them to sing. “
Such a beautiful thought, of spreading Joy around you. I hope to become this kind of person someday in future. Obviously, your own heart has to be full of Love and Joy before people around you can sense these vibrations. You can spread or give only that which you have. So, I pray that sometime, someday, I have a heart full of love and joy and maybe then I can be a person who can help people sing. I know I have a very long way to go, but I have heard Osho say that having a desire to attain higher goals is the first step towards attaining them. Of course, you have to work hard to finally achieve it; but I am at least taking the first step.
What about you ?
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

A few days ago, a friend sent me a quote which said, “Don’t offer a lecture to a person who needs a hug!” And it totally resonated with me! It reminded me of something that we used to talk about in our ’Wise Parenting ‘ series of talks for parents of kindergarten children. We used to discuss a lot about disciplining a child and whether to punish a child or not and how to punish in case punishment is absolutely essential. One very important point to remember in this connection is that ‘A child needs your love the most when he deserves it the least ! ‘
Every child knows when he has not behaved well, when he has broken the rules of his home and he is scared of punishment when the parents learn about this behaviour. But if the punishment is too harsh, the child learns to try to hide his mistakes so as to escape punishment. But that’s not really what we want as a parent, right ? We want the child to learn about the right way of behaving, of the values of his family and this may not necessarily happen when the parents treat a mistake as a crime. In fact, it’s ok to make mistakes, it’s ok to accept your mistakes as long as you try your best to not make the same mistake again. And that is how we learn to do the right thing… through making mistakes and correcting them, isn’t it ?
And that’s why, love should be an integral component of any punishment or reprimands and what better way to do that than to hug the child ? When you hug someone who has made a mistake, you are telling him without saying anything that your love for him is not affected by his actions. Of course, it doesn’t mean that we cover up the mistakes, just that the first thing we convey to the person is that we love him irrespective of his mistakes and our love for each other is more important than anything else in life. Later, we can take the necessary steps to ensure that such behaviour is not repeated in the future. But let us start with a hug, let us start with trying to understand why the person behaved in this manner and then decide on the appropriate response.
Would you like to try this out whenever someone makes a mistake ?

Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Rumi says, “ There’s a fountain inside you. Don’t walk around with an empty bucket.”
Rumi is talking about each and everyone of us. Almost all of us are unaware of the fountain of Joy that resides deep within us. We are not in touch with our own strengths and our inherent treasures. And that’s why, very often, we think that we are poor, and we beg for things from God. We see even kings and extremely rich people begging for something or the other from the supreme power. The simple reason for this is that we are ignorant about our inner wealth. Over the years, the fountain of Joy dwelling within us has been covered with layers and layers of anger, hatred, jealousy, complaints, blames, anxieties and worries and so on. Unless we strive to peel off these layers of negativity, we will not able to experience the droplets of joy that spring forth from our inner fountain. And then we roam around with empty buckets, looking outside for treasures that are actually hidden within us. To quote Rumi once again, “ We seek outside the wonders we carry inside us.”

Hope each one of us can experience this fountain within us,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

I was talking to a friend a few days ago, and she said to me, “I have not travelled by train in a long time. I think I have lost my stamina.“ We often use this word, don’t we? And most of the times we mean a physical stamina….. stamina to do some physical work or exercise. But when I looked up the definition of stamina, the dictionary says that stamina is the ability to do something that involves a lot of physical or mental effort for a long time. So stamina does not mean just physical efforts, but also mental efforts. We all know that we can improve our physical stamina gradually over a period of days if we continue to do the same kind of activity and slowly increase the duration or the intensity of the activity. For example, climbing stairs— if we are used to lifts and escalators, we may get breathless on climbing just one floor. But if we practise climbing one floor every day and gradually increase the number of stairs over a period of a month or two, we can easily climb 3 to 4 floors at one go. The same is true with any physical work. I am sure most of us experienced this during lock down when our household helps could not come for work. Though initially we found it a lot of hard work, over a period of 8 to 10 days, we could easily manage all the physical work and cooking, and still get some free time on hand, and more importantly, not get too tired in the process.
Just as we can improve our physical stamina, we can work on our mental stamina also. Just to take the simple example of children going to school….. In the early years of school, children are not expected to put in a lot of mental effort, but gradually, as they go to higher standards, the duration and intensity of mental efforts increase and most of them can easily manage this because it is a slow gradual process, at least in the initial few years. Even as adults we can improve our mental stamina, by gradually increasing the duration of the mental efforts and of course by exerting our will power.

Just as I was thinking about the physical and mental stamina, I heard a very interesting talk by BK Shivani Didi. She introduced the concept of “spiritual stamina “ ! Though I heard this word for the first time, I could very easily relate to this term, especially because I have experienced the truth of this spiritual stamina. But to go back to Shivani didi’s talk…..she said that many people find it very difficult to put into practise simple spiritual activities like meditation, letting go of anger, forgiveness, being kind and compassionate et cetera. This is because they are not used to practising these things and that’s why they not sure about their ability to do so. They also have doubts about their success. She then advised her audience that just as you can increase the physical stamina, you can improve upon your spiritual stamina too by persistently behaving in the right manner in small steps. Being sincere and regular in any spiritual practice can give us excellent results. For example, initially you may find it very hard to let go of your anger, but as you practise a spiritual practice like meditation or listening to spiritual discourses on a daily basis, the intensity of your anger, the way that you express your anger, the time that you take to let go of your anger, all these things can improve gradually. And my personal experience is that when you master some of these practices, the Joy that you derive out of your success is much more than the Joy of improving physical or mental stamina !

Just as I was writing this, I got very angry with someone and frustrated that I couldn’t express my anger to that person. And then it dawned upon me that I need to work a lot on building up my spiritual stamina !

What about you ? Are you ready to increase your spiritual stamina ?

Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Today morning, I received a good morning message from a dear friend which said, “When you really pay attention, everything is your teacher.” And how true this statement is ! Everything around you, every human being, every situation, even the inanimate objects have the potential to teach you something; but only if we are receptive ! Most of the times, we are so engrossed in our own world and our life with its inherent problems, that we don’t look around. Or even when we look around, we only see with our physical eyes, without paying any attention to the essence. And then we miss out on the important messages that life is giving us.
So many apparently simple things are happening around us all the time. On the surface, they seem to be ordinary. But if we look into their depths, they have the capacity to inspire us to achieve our highest potential. When we look around us with our spiritual eyes, we can grasp the real, deeper meaning which can nurture us on our spiritual journey. And if we get an awakening even once, it can set us on the right path ( the path which is right for us, individually ! ) and once we find the path that is the right one for us, there’s no looking back.
I remember writing an essay about “तेथे कर माझे जुळती” ( can be roughly translated as I bow down to them ) in 10th standard. I have forgotten most of the other stuff that I learned in school, but I still vividly recollect what I had written in this essay. And it portrayed the same feeling of ‘everything is your teacher’. I had expressed my admiration about ordinary people like my friends or acquaintances who showed exceptional qualities while going through difficult situations. After so many years, when I remembered that essay today, I realised that I had unconsciously grasped a profound truth at that young age; but had inadvertently let go of it as I was caught up with life and its challenges.

Today morning, when I opened this message, I was reminded of this profound truth. Everyone and everything can be our teacher, if we pay attention. I think many times, we miss out on the ‘paying attention’ part. So many teachers are available to us, but we are not available to them ! And unless we are receptive to the teachings that the Universe is sending our way, it will be impossible to learn them.

So, even though many years have passed, I have decided to look at life and everything that crosses my path with spiritual eyes and a deep and sincere desire in my heart to learn every day.
Would you also like to try this out ?
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar