Good morning friends !

At the beginning of a new year, we generally take stock of whatever happened in the last year…. Good or bad… and reflect on our own actions during the whole year.

These reflections are very useful as they can be a guide for future decisions and actions, so that we can stay on the right path and also progress on it, step by step. Just as it is important to reflect on our mistakes, it is essential to acknowledge the good things that we were able to achieve in the last year. Reflecting on our good points and actions and patting ourselves on our backs can encourage us to continue to improve and progress.

Hoping that you can find that you were able to do many good deeds in the last year that helped not only yourself but also others around you,

Love,

Anjali

Good Morning friends

As I was writing about reflections yesterday, I remembered a different kind of reflection from my childhood. I had visited a fair and there was a stall with different kinds of mirrors. Normally, a mirror shows you a true image of yourself, though the image is laterally inverted. This stall had one mirror which showed you much thinner and taller than your normal self, another one in which you were fatter and shorter and yet another that showed a distorted view of yourself. Nevertheless, it was fun to see these funny images, basically because you knew that they were not real.

In real life too, we have many mirrors around us, in the form of people. You can see your image in the eyes of the people surrounding you. These reflections can talk about your physical aspects as well as your behaviour. The funny thing is that these reflections differ with different people, though you are the same! For example; someone tells you that you are looking very good today and a few minutes later, somebody else asks you whether you are unwell today !The same thing happens with our behaviour. Some people may praise our behaviour in a certain situation and some others may criticise the same behaviour in the same situation. All this is ok if we can remember that the others are just different kinds of mirrors… like those in a fair… the reflections that each of these mirrors show depends on their perspective, their understanding and maturity, their relationship with you, their own state of mind, their past experiences etc etc. Unfortunately, we often get swayed by these reflections… we can be in the seventh heaven when someone praises us; but we can be down in the dumps when others are critical of our actions. In short, we get unduly and unnecessarily affected by these mirrors around us because we believe that their reflections are the true reflections.

How can we prevent this from happening ? It’s easier said than done of course! But if we are aware of our own inherent strengths and limitations, if we are grounded in the reality of who we are and in which direction we are going, then, to a certain extent, we can avoid being unnecessarily influenced by other’s opinions. In short, we can realise which one is the true mirror ( showing a true, unbiased image) and which one is showing a distorted image. And the easiest way to realise this is through meditation. More about meditation some other time….

Hoping that all of us have at least one true mirror around us which shows us as we are in reality,

Love,

Anjali

Good Morning
For the puzzle lovers, two words are hidden in today’s Mandala , a ten-letter word and a six-letter word. The alphabets are jumbled up. Have fun searching the letters and guessing the words.
Hint: these words appeared often in today’s and yesterday’s write-up

Good morning friends

Yesterday I was talking about reflections and how other people are mirrors for us. While we are considering the fact that others can be a mirror for our behaviour, let us not forget that we ourselves are also acting as mirrors for others!
Whenever we interact with someone, the images that we project stem from our own thoughts and past experiences and our understanding and maturity and so on. If we are absolutely aware, we can project a true, unbiased image; but most of the times, this is not the case and the images that we project are biased images.
I remember learning Newton’s third law of motion in school. It says, every action has an equal and opposite reaction. But with respect to the reflections that we are talking about, I think every action has the same kind of reaction, which may at times be much stronger than the original action.
To give you an example: if I am interacting with someone, and that person retaliates with anger, then it is very likely that I too will get angry and react back in a similar way, or at times even violently. And this process can be repeated again and again as the other person reacts in a similar manner.
Do you remember visiting places which have many mirrors placed at angles, and you can see hundreds of images of yourself in those mirrors? A similar thing can happen with emotions reflected in the mirrors around us, especially with negative emotions. And so the negative feelings like anger or hatred or jealousy can get multiplied several times! I’m sure you can imagine the ultimate results of these reflections. … obviously, there will be dire consequences affecting our relationships, our lives as well as our health on a personal level.
To prevent this, once again, it is important to become aware of how we are mirroring the behaviour of others. And the best way to do this is to practise Meditation!
I hope that we can become more mindful and aware of the reflections that we are projecting from our own mirrors,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

When we talked about reflections in the eyes of the people around us, we talked mainly about negative emotions. But let us not forget the power of positive thoughts and emotions that can also be reflected through us. And just as the negative emotions can get multiplied when reflected, the positive thoughts and emotions can also multiply and influence those around us.
I am sure all of us have noticed that if someone smiles at you, your immediate response is to smile back. And a random smile or words of appreciation and encouragement can uplift our mood and we tend to spread these vibes to others around us.
If we become aware of our own responsibility as a mirror projecting reflections, maybe we would strive harder to send out positive images.
Many times in social gatherings, I find that we tend to complain about the inadequacies in our system or the corruption or the attitude of the new generation etc. And I start feeling depressed….But instead of complaining all the time, what if we decided to talk about the good things that are happening in our city or share information about individuals/ organisations doing good work for the society ? Wouldn’t that make us happier ?
Simple habits like smiling and greeting the people you meet can go a long way in creating a happier, peaceful environment.
If we decide to focus more on positive values like Joy and Peace and Love and Appreciation and try spreading them, we should be able to positively change the vibrations of those connected to us. And just as the negative reflections can multiply, the positive ones will also multiply and the world will become a better place to live in.
In this new year, let us strive to spread more positive reflections around us.
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends
Yesterday I was waiting to cross the busy main road near my house. A steady stream of vehicles was flowing through the road making it impossible to cross it. Just then there was a very loud, irritating noise which disrupted the relative peace of the busy road. And this sound was the persistent honking from a scooter whose owner wanted to get ahead quickly. Next to the scooter was an SUV, which was gliding smoothly and silently.
As I saw this , I noticed that the smaller vehicle was making much more noise than the bigger, stronger vehicle. And doesn’t that happen often in life too ? Those with only a partial understanding of things tend to show off a lot; while those with a deeper understanding of the world choose to remain silent and humble.
In marathi, there’s a saying, उथळ पाण्याला खळखळाट फार, which aptly describes this situation.
I hope we all can refrain from behaving like the noisy scooter,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

These days a डोंबारी family is moving around in Andheri east, exhibiting their show wherever they find some space on the crowded streets. These acrobats generally have the male member beating the drum and the females walking on the tight rope a few feet above the ground. It’s a risky business with no safety nets to protect them in case of a fall. The other day, I saw a young girl from the family balancing herself with the help of a long stick. She would first swing a little to the right side and almost immediately swing to the left. This tight- rope balancing continued smoothly until she reached the other end of the rope.

As I watched her, I thought that life is just like walking on the tight rope, isn’t it ? It is very important to maintain balance in any situation. If we move too much to one side, there’s a real danger of falling off the rope. So, we have to be aware and careful not to sway too much to any one side.
It holds true for all the opposites in life, especially for the work- life ( or call it the work-relaxation) balance. If we work too much, we get burnt out; and if we play too much, we waste our time and energy. So, we have to be creative about balancing our work and relaxation. Speaking for ourselves, taking small breaks on a regular basis has been tremendously beneficial in rejuvenating us and helped us come back to work with renewed energy.

The same balance is essential in medicine. As a practising doctor, it is important to keep a fine balance between conservative and aggressive approach of treatment. If you are too conservative, occasionally,the patient may end up in complications ; on the other hand, if you are too aggressive, the treatment itself may at times be harmful to the patient. Walking this tight rope is difficult at times. It is an art which every doctor has to learn eventually, and many times the art gets perfected only with many years of practice ( that’s probably why we say that doctors practise medicine! ).

And the same principle of balance holds true for most situations in life—- in dealing with children, in dealing with your juniors, in your relationships with your superiors, in holding on and letting go—- in fact, in everything that we do !

I hope that you are able to master this wonderful knack of ‘balancing’,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

Did you see today’s Mandala ?
Do you find any difference in this Mandala if you compare it with my other Mandalas ?

I am asking this because I have used a different method to draw this particular Mandala ( at the insistence of my son, Satyajit )

Generally, I have been quite an adamant person with respect to the way I do things. If I am happy or comfortable with a particular way of working, then it is not easy to persuade me to change my ways. But over the years, especially with coaxing from Satyajit, I have tried to be open to alternative methods of carrying out my work. I have realised that at times, a new approach can be better in terms of reducing my efforts and improving my efficiency. So, these days, I am more open to suggestions about embracing new ideas.

And that’s why I tried out this new method of drawing a Mandala. As I have used this technique for the first time, I am sure that I can do better as I practise this technique more often.

Please let me know if you find any significant difference/ improvement in this Mandala, as compared to my previous ones.
I would also like you to guess what method I have used to create this Mandala.

Wishing you a wonderful day,
Love,
Anjal

Good morning friends

Thank you friends for your interest in my Mandalas and your response to my question about yesterday’s Mandala. Though I received many responses, only two people got it right !

And the answer is: yesterday’s Mandala was a virtual or a digital Mandala, drawn on an iPad with its special pencil. I don’t have a physical copy of this Mandala, only soft copies.

As I mentioned yesterday, I am quite set in my ways most of the times, so I was not very enthusiastic about trying out this new technique. But now that I have tried it, I will use it occasionally, especially when I can’t carry my sketchbook and pens around. Having said that, I still prefer drawing with real paper with real pens because of the sheer pleasure I get in the process. The same thing applies for books. I know that many good books are available online/ on kindle etc, but the pleasure I get in holding the physical copy of a book in my hand is incomparable. A digital copy cannot match this by any stretch of imagination.

So, though I have drawn today’s Mandala also digitally ( and I think it is better than yesterday’s! ), I don’t think I will continue to use this technique on a regular basis.

The only reason I tried this new method is because these days ( especially since I have joined the senior citizens’ club ) I don’t miss out on any opportunities to try to learn something new. And that’s why, I will use this technique until I have learnt all the new skills with the iPad.

Scientific research has shown that new learning is invaluable for the prevention of Alzheimer’s. These days, we are finding that the incidence of Alzheimer’s is increasing rapidly; so it’s best to start preventive measures as early as possible, maybe in your fifties.
More about this some other time ….

Wishing that you get many opportunities to learn new skills in this new year,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

As I was reminiscing about Rumi’s quote on ‘seeking’, I remembered another quote by Rumi himself. He says,“We seek outside the wonders that we carry inside us “
And I think every saint and guru ( guru in the true sense, not the so-called gurus advertising themselves! ) has said the same, just that the words are different.

Osho has always talked about this inner treasure that we are unaware of. In the hustle bustle of modern life, man has drifted away from this treasure, but luckily meditation can give us a glimpse of it.
Those who have never practised meditation can experience it in quiet moments, in the company of nature, while gazing at the countless stars in the sky from a mountain top, in the innocent smile of a small baby. We can also get a taste of the divine within us when we see someone helping others without any expectations or in the presence of unconditional love. Whenever thoughts stop, even momentarily, we can experience this fragrance. So, as Osho says, if you do any work with totality, you can get a glimpse of this wonder that we carry inside us, and especially with arts like drawing or painting or music or dance. The divine is always available to us; the question is whether we are available to the divine !

Hoping that we can find these wonders within ourselves, at least get a glimpse so that we are encouraged to seek them out,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

I just came across a Rumi quote, ” What you seek is seeking you “
Rumi was a great philosopher, but more importantly, he was a poet at heart. So all his writings are poetic and they are straight from his heart or should I say, straight from his soul….

Whenever I come across a Rumi quote, I can recognise it as his because of this poetic quality. And that’s why, even though I have read only a few of his poems, I am in love with his writing.

All of his quotes have such a profound depth….there are layers and layers of meaning hidden in the depths of his poems and it’s so satisfying to find the deepest meaning.

What you seek is seeking you—- when I read this, it gave me goosebumps !
If what I am seeking is also seeking me, then what should I be seeking? Money, fame, prestige, a bigger house, material wealth or wealth far beyond all that… ? If it’s certain that we get what we seek, should I seek just worldly pleasures or pleasures on another scale altogether?
The question and its obvious answer brought tears to my eyes, so now I know what I am seeking. As Rumi promises, the same treasure will be seeking me too, if my desire is strong enough…. I only need to wait patiently till it finds me.

Hope that we all focus on seeking everlasting treasures,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

A few days ago, I somehow stained my right wrist. Normally, I don’t pay much attention to my wrists because compared to the whole body, they are such a small part. But that’s when everything is going smoothly. The moment I sprained it, I realised what an important part it plays in my day-to-day activities. As the movement of the wrist was painful, I found myself handicapped. It affected so many seemingly simple tasks… brushing my teeth, combing my hair, tying my hair , lifting up utensils, cooking, lifting the water-filled mug while bathing, and so on. Even getting up from the floor was tough as I could not take the support of my right hand. But more than anything, I started thinking about how I was going to draw my daily Mandala. Luckily, I immediately realised that this kind of thinking was not what I needed. From my past experiences, I knew where this would lead me… first worrying, then complaining, then thinking’ why did this have to happen just now’… and this line of negative thinking can just continue indefinitely.

So I consciously took a decision to change tracks, and focused on this exceptional entity called ‘body’. Not only are our bodies supercomputers in terms of intellectual functioning, they are also superior to machines in the amazing way they function. They are better than most machines and more importantly, they are intelligent machines. Add to this the incredible fact that our bodies have an inherent capacity to heal themselves, and of course, we cannot exist without our bodies. So, how grateful should we be to our bodies ? Immensely grateful, right ? But in reality, what do we do ? We take our bodies for granted, we use them excessively, and many times, without giving them adequate rest but nevertheless, expect them to work smoothly. Hardly any of us appreciates our bodies, leave alone be grateful to them. Still, our bodies are faithful to us and obedient; but obviously, they work far better when we are grateful to them and also when we take care of them.
Talking about my wrist, as I focused on the importance of my wrist in my daily life and started thanking it and caressing it and giving it rest, miraculously it healed on its own in two days. I was amazed by the speed of recovery; I had thought that it would take at least one week to be fully functional again. But that’s how our bodies can surprise us if we show them love and care and gratitude.

Hope that all of us can take up the practice of thanking our bodies daily,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

Yesterday as I was writing about the sprain in my wrist and its effects on me, a new realisation dawned upon me. Before I sprained my wrist, I had hardly ever given any particular thought to my wrist, taking it for granted. Only after the sprain, did I become aware of the importance of this seemingly insignificant part of my body. This incident got me thinking. Just like the wrist, which made its presence felt only when it was injured, there are many people in our lives who work hard to make our lives easier and more comfortable. But when everything is running smoothly, we don’t give a thought to them , we take them for granted. Only when they are not around do we understand their significance and their contribution in our lives. An example which all ladies would certainly connect with is the part played by our household helps. When they are around, the house runs smoothly even in the absence of the lady of the house; but in their absence, the entire machinery can break down. In spite of this well known fact, we take them for granted ( as we feel that as they are being paid for this, what’s so great if they do their job well )and complain when they take leave. But how often do we genuinely thank them for their service? How often do we remember to be grateful to them for their efforts ? I know that in my youth, I have often been guilty of this ungrateful behaviour.
The same is true for the majority of the so-called insignificant people who take care of the various aspects of our lives, so that we can pursue our careers or our hobbies. Only when we have the backup of this network can we aspire to reach for higher goals. Our lives are supported by so many people, very few of them are visible to us; the majority remain invisible to us. If we start thinking about it, we can bring to our mind the names of a few of them, like our driver, security guards, sanitation workers, gardeners working in our society etc. But the vast majority of them are unknown to us like the bankers or the postmen ( courier people these days! ), transportation workers, municipal or government workers and officials etc. We are vociferous in our complaints when something goes wrong, but how often do we go back and thank the concerned people when our work is done smoothly?

So, just as it is essential to thank our body daily, it is important to remember and appreciate the efforts of each individual who makes our life easier and better. We can do this on a personal basis when we know them. And for the unknown ones, we can at least thank them in our hearts.

Hoping that all of us remember to acknowledge the help of all the visible and invisible people making our lives better and thank them,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

I remember reading “Everything that happens to you happens for a reason.” In fact, every situation has the potential to teach you something new, if only you are open and receptive to it and this was confirmed by my wrist sprain. I hope you are not bored with my wrist

पुराण ! ( पुराण  generally means mythology , but in this case it can be loosely translated as harping on a particular topic…. )

Coming back to my wrist, it has taught me quite a few things…actually taught may not be the right word, because I knew about these facts but they had receded into the background as time passed and the wrist incident reminded me of their importance in my life. So,what is it that I have relearned?

Firstly, I have been reminded about the importance of thanking my body, not just my whole body but also the individual components which make up the whole. I have also understood that this offering of gratitude should not be just a ritual, but it is something you feel deep within yourself. So, now I practise thanking my body in the morning for the fact that I am alive and at night once again that I could do so much throughout the day with the help of my amazing body, with special emphasis on the body parts which may have aches or pain ….. and of course, meaning every single word of this gratitude prayer.

Secondly, I have realised the importance of the people who beautify my life, visible or otherwise. So, thanking everyone who helps me ( even if they do it for a salary ) is crucial.

Thirdly, I have actually experienced the truth of the statement “ Everything that happens in life, happens for a reason “. So, my wrist sprain has actually jolted me back into practising gratitude more sincerely and not just as a ritual.

I hope that you too can perceive each situation in life as a blessing in disguise, a lesson that can teach ( or remind) you of certain important truths of life,

Love,

Anjali

Good morning friends

These days the weather in Mumbai is lovely, at least by Mumbai standards ! For true Mumbaikars ( i.e. those born and brought up in Mumbai like me ), this is the only time in the whole year when we can take out our sweaters and shawls from the cupboards. This week or two, whenever we Mumbaikars meet, we say to each other, “Mumbai is like a hill station now “. And we try our best to make the most of this season.

One festival which is celebrated in this month is Makarsankrant. It’s called by different names in different states. Maharashtra has the tradition of exchanging Tilgul ( sesame and jaggery laddoos) on this day. We give these sweets to everyone we meet and say, “ तिळगूळ घ्या, गोड बोला” ( meaning accept the sweet laddoos and speak sweetly). I have never really understood the logic of this greeting. I mean, aren’t we supposed to speak sweetly with everyone? Then why do you have to tell this in so many words? And the other question is,” Do people change their ways and actually talk sweetly just because they are told to do so?” But traditions are traditions and we often follow them out of habit, because we have been doing so from our childhood. And then, we revert back to our old ways once the tilgul festival is over.

For the last 10 years or more, I have become the member of a Japanese spiritual organisation. And one practice that we members follow diligently is greeting everyone cheerfully when we visit the centre or meet each other. Since I started following this practice, I have noticed that cheerful greetings go a long way in brightening up the atmosphere. When you greet everyone with a smile, you too, feel more cheerful. In fact, when we visited Japan, we found out that this practice is very common in Japan. Wherever we went, we were greeted in the morning by ‘Ohayo gozaimasu’ ( good morning ) or ’Arigato gozaimasu’ ( thank you ) when we left the place. We were impressed by this simple but powerful practice. And while in Japan, we started greeting them back with Ohayo or Arigato. When you greet people this way with a smile on your face, you naturally feel connected to them and feel comfortable even in a foreign country. After coming back, I have tried to follow the practice of greeting people cheerfully with a smile whenever possible and it does improve the atmosphere.

Do try this practice of cheerful greetings ( if you are not already doing it) and you will notice the positive change at home or in the workplace in a few days.
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

A few days ago, I was very angry with someone. As usual, when you get angry with somebody, you think that you are perfectly right and the other person is absolutely wrong. And that’s what happened to me too. I felt that the other person’s behaviour was irrational and hurtful. As I was going through this phase of anger, some philosophical sayings which I had read earlier flashed in front of my eyes. I remembered Buddha’s words, “ Anger is like holding a burning coal in your hands. You harm yourself more than the other person with your anger ” I also remembered reading,” Your anger belongs to you. The other person is just a trigger.“
But just knowing the philosophical sayings does not mean that you have imbibed them. At that moment, the fact was that I was very angry and these sayings were doing nothing to help me let go of that anger.
And as I could not let go of the anger, the judge which resides inside all of us was galvanised into action. This judge started blaming me and inducing guilt in me. I was about to get into the guilt mode, when I was reminded of Rumi’s poem guesthouse.
Rumi says,
“ This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all !
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture.
Still, treat each guest honourably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thoughts, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
Because each has been sent as a guide from beyond. “

Remembering this poem brought a smile to my face and solace to my soul. I realised that it’s ok to have negative feelings at times. It’s a part of being human ! Though you are trying various methods to better yourself, you are not yet enlightened, not yet a saint. So, though you may continue to expect the highest level of behaviour from yourself, accept your faults when you stray away. There’s no need to feel guilty when you make mistakes. Go easy on yourself in such situations. Also try to remember that at times these situations can teach you important lessons.

This awakening put my mind at ease and that also helped me let go of my anger a few hours later.

Hoping that all of us are not too harsh with ourselves when we make mistakes,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

Yesterday I was talking about the inner judge who resides in us. This inner judge has very high standards and is very critical. He is always ready to criticise us whenever our behaviour is not right. He helps us walk on the righteous path, pointing out our mistakes when we stray away from the path. While this judge plays an important role in keeping us on track, at times he can also cause harm if he is too critical. I know people close to me who are outwardly extremely successful in their lives…not just in their profession but also in their hobbies or social work, but not happy because of this strict judge that resides in them.
This judge is an expert at comparing us with others, especially with those who have achieved much more than us or those who are doing very good work. While it is important to work hard and do your best, it is not always right to compare ourselves with others. When that happens we expect too much from ourselves , things beyond our capabilities. We must remember that each one of us is unique, एकमेव अद्वितीय ! No two persons are alike, even twins have differences. Each one of us has different strengths and weaknesses, each one has faced different challenges and each one has responded differently to life according to his/ her personality.

So, like everything else, balance is important with respect to our judge…. If he is lax, we can stray from the righteous path and if he is too strict, he can harm us.
That’s why, it is important to keep the inner judge in check and appreciate our own achievements from time to time. There is one very simple and effective way of doing this. Before sleeping, look at yourself in the mirror, remember all the wonderful things that you did during the day and congratulate yourself. You can appreciate even minor accomplishments like exercising or reducing your screen time. This practice focuses on your strengths and can improve your self esteem and confidence. And more importantly, it increases your happiness index. I have experienced this since I started this practice a few years ago.

Do try this out and experience firsthand the benefits of appreciating yourself,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

On Sunday, we were travelling back from Pune via the expressway. There was a long tunnel which the car entered. And I felt that the tunnel was very dark. It was difficult to see anything clearly. I was wondering how the driver would be able to drive in this situation and was about to vocalise my thoughts when I realised that I was wearing my dark glasses! It had been quite bright and sunny when we began our journey home, so I was wearing my goggles. The moment I became aware of this fact, I took them off and then it was obvious to me that the tunnel was in fact, very well lit.
I was laughing at myself for my lack of awareness when something else struck me. I started thinking, isn’t this what happens when you look at the world through your glasses… glasses of judgement, of prejudices, of preconceived ideas….and so on. If you are wearing dark glasses, then the whole world looks dark and gloomy to you, with no signs of hope anywhere. On the other hand, if you are looking at the world through brightly coloured glasses, the world may look more promising than it really is. It’s just a matter of which glasses you are wearing.
And most of the time, we are not even aware that we are wearing these glasses !
Generally, there’s a sign board before you enter a tunnel which tells you to take off your dark glasses. Just like this sign, won’t it be good to have some warning sign which reminds you that you are looking at things through your coloured glasses? I am sure if we are aware of the glasses, we will not jump to wrong conclusions.

Hoping that all of us are aware of the glasses though which we look at the world,
Love,
Anjali

Good morning friends

At the moment of writing this, I am sitting outside the operation theatre waiting for my sister-in-law’s knee surgery to get over. The waiting lounge is common for the operation theatre as well as the ICU. So, many people are anxiously waiting in the lounge. Most of the relatives are either talking on the phone or amongst themselves or engaged in reading from their phones. Still, they cannot hide their anxiety. It reveals itself in the way they look up when a name or bed number is called out, in the way they cannot really concentrate on reading, in the way they fidget….
This anxiety and worrying is of course, quite normal in these circumstances, but beyond a certain point, it can be detrimental not only for the relatives, but also for the patients, especially when you are in close proximity to the patient. This is because the anxiety vibrations attract similar negative vibrations. That’s why it is recommended in the medical profession that a doctor should not operate upon a close family member. The reason behind this is very simple: If the operating doctor is very anxious ( because of his close relationship), then there are more chances that mistakes may occur.
Even while treating someone, it’s my experience that if the patient is very dear to you, outwardly you may be reassuring, but in your mind you start thinking of all sorts of rare complications and that is actually absolutely irrational…. And the funny thing is that this doesn’t happen when you are treating a patient with a similar condition but he/ she is not related to you. It means that close relationship with a patient may increase the doctor’s anxiety level.
I have heard Osho talk about this excessive anxiety in close relatives of patients. He says that if a child is seriously ill and the mother is very anxious, it is better for someone else to take care of her child. Because if the mother is sending out anxious vibrations all the time, if she has irrational fears, the child also unconsciously absorbs these vibrations, which in turn will attract more negative vibrations. Obviously, this will adversely affect the recovery process.
And the same is true for adult patients too. Persons looking after a very sick person should be caring but preferably unrelated to the patient as they will not worry too much about the patient and his condition. That’s probably why relatives are not permitted in the ICUs of hospitals. Of course, the relatives should be allowed to see the patient for at least a few minutes during the day to reassure both the patients and their families or friends.
And when you actually see a sick patient, it is better if you can smile and send out positive vibrations rather than breaking down in tears. This is easier said than done of course, but one thing which can help anyone in this situation is to offer prayers. Sincere prayers can significantly reduce your anxiety and stress because you can transfer all your worries to the God or the supreme power in which you believe …परमेश्वरावर भार टाकून मोकळं होता येतं…I think prayers can also help you trust that whatever happens will be the best outcome. 
Speaking for myself, I carried my Mandala gear with me and while waiting for the operation to get over… it took close to 6 hours…. I reduced my stress by meditatively drawing 3 Mandalas. 
More about what to do and what not to do in the presence of a serious patient some other time.
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Recently one particular video is making the rounds of almost all the groups on WhatsApp. This video depicts how musical notes can arrange rangoli powder into beautiful designs. And if inanimate elements like powders can take the shape of beautiful forms with the influence of music, what sort of effect would music have on living beings?

Yesterday, I wrote about the anxiety vibrations of relatives in hospitals. But just as there are negative vibrations, there are positive vibrations too. Obviously, just as negative vibrations negatively impact the recovery of a person, positive vibrations will positively affect the mindset of any patient.

As paediatricians, we often observe the effects of the parents’ emotions on their child’s behaviour. This phenomenon is particularly noticeable in babies with evening colic. These babies have crying spells, mostly in the evening, apparently due to pain in their tummies. We find that the baby cries more if the person holding the baby is very anxious, worried. But if a calm,peaceful person picks up the baby, the baby quietens down almost immediately. It is almost as if the peaceful vibrations are being transmitted to the baby either through touch or through close proximity. Not surprisingly, the baby resumes its crying with gusto as soon as the anxious parent picks it up.
We regularly advise the playing of soft music for babies with evening colic. Soft music can also be useful in putting fussy babies to sleep.
Generally, babies and young children are more sensitive to vibrations, either positive or negative. And exposing children to soothing, relaxing music can have long lasting positive effects on children.
Music is also extremely useful in meditation. Osho has utilised music in almost all of his meditations and listening to that music can help you enter a meditative state smoothly. But more about music in Osho meditations some other time.
I hope that all of us are able to find the magic in music,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

22/1/23

Good morning friends

Have you seen the video about the 3 plants experiment which is doing the rounds of WhatsApp these days ? I have received this video from many sources and I am glad that it is going viral because it emphasises the importance of good words.
The video shows the difference in the growth of the plants subjected to different conditions. One plant was given just water. To the second one, they spoke positively, words of encouragement and praise and gratitude. The third one was subjected to negative comments and criticism. And they found significant differences in the growth of these 3 plants. The plant which received positive vibrations, was the healthiest. The plant that was criticised was stunted.

This experiment just confirms the fact that spoken words have great power. And we can use this power either positively or negatively.
The spiritual organisation that I belong to has used this power very effectively in farming and has got excellent results.

If even plants respond to the vibrations of the spoken word, we can imagine what would happen to human beings when they are subjected to either positive or negative words. So, shouldn’t we be very careful when we talk to people, especially children who are extremely sensitive and vulnerable? If we watch our speech, resolve to use only good words along with positive vibrations while dealing with children, I am sure that half the problems of communication between parents and their children will be solved.
And this applies not only in the home environment, but also in the workplace, in the society and every place where human beings interact with each other.

Hoping that all of us resolve to use positive words whenever possible,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

I was reading a quote, ”As you start to walk on the way, the way appears”. Needless to say, this is a Rumi quote !

As I was reading this, I thought to myself that Rumi’s poetry is not something you try to understand; it has to be experienced, you have to allow his words and their hidden meanings seep into your heart and soul. You just have to feel the words and the world it opens up, you have to close your eyes and feel the love emanating from his words. You have to allow yourself to be drawn into the joys that the lines portray, let them surround you and engulf you and drown you so that when you come up for a breath, you are no longer the old, tired you but a rejuvenated version of yourself. And this happens to me every time I read Rumi. I am unable to analyse it but I can experience it with my body, mind and soul. That’s why I love Rumi !

Hope that you too can have a taste of poets like Rumi who can touch your heart and soul,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

A few days ago, we visited Manoj’s uncle and aunt (Kaka kaku as we call them )in Mulund. For all three of us, it’s always a pleasure to visit them and spend some leisurely time with them, as we have a special bond with them. Kaka is now in his 90s and Kaku in her 80s. But looking at their enthusiasm for life , it is hard to believe their age.

Every time we visit them, I am amazed by some new facet of their personality. They are always trying out something new, something different. The last time I visited them, kaku told me that she had adopted a new method to prepare tea ! And the tea certainly tasted great. Another time, she showed me a simpler and less time consuming way to cook dal. Both of them are experimenting all the time even at this age, when their contemporaries are set and rigid in their ways. We always get to taste seasonal recipes, especially different kinds of homemade pickles in their home. It’s heartening to see their enthusiasm for life in spite of the various physical challenges that age has brought them.

This time during our visit, I found that they had changed the brand of their tea. I asked kaka the reason for this change and he said with a smile,” We can’t go out for shopping now, so we have to depend on someone to get things for us. “, but as he said this, there was no complaint in his voice… it was a total acceptance of his situation. He added,” But this brand is also very good!” How many of us can accept change so readily, without a single complaint ?

During the second wave of Covid, both of them caught the virus and were admitted for almost 6 weeks in the hospital. Kaka was in ICU for 3 weeks. But this did not dampen his enthusiasm in any way. Every time we talked to him on a video call, he would say, “ Everything is absolutely fine “ (मस्त आहे ….with a lot of emphasis onमस्त ! )

… and this was happening in an ICU setting, with oxygen mask and IVs and monitors attached to him. I really understood the meaning of “acceptance “…. accepting any situation with total gratitude… from him during these times. Covid hospitalisation didn’t dampen kaka-kaku’s spirits; if at all, they are stronger and more resilient and more cheerful now.

We find many senior citizens set in their ways and not willing to change. Some senior citizens are either bored with life or complaining about their lives all the time. This amazing couple is just the opposite. Kaku talked about their life once and said, “It has been a beautiful life”; though I know for a fact that they have faced many challenges and difficulties in their life. They are my role models in more ways than one and I hope to emulate at least a few of their qualities as I grow older. They are curious, full of wonder, ready to try out something new, contented, satisfied and probably that’s why they are very happy. When I return home after visiting them , my bag is full, not just with homemade pickles and masalas and laddoos, but with many more qualities like zest towards life and satisfaction and acceptance and also a more positive attitude . As I write this, I have tears of gratitude in my eyes that I am privileged to be close to this wonderful couple.

I hope that as I grow older, I can imbibe at least a few of their wonderful qualities,

Love,

Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Last month, we were expecting a very important guest’s visit to our home. And as this guest was visiting us for the first time, we wanted our home to look clean and beautiful. And so started a frenzy of cleaning the house. I am sure most of you have gone through this sort of experience many times. We are galvanised into the cleaning activity whenever we expect someone to come over. Otherwise, we are comfortable in the homely untidiness! ( except for the few souls who are obsessive about cleanliness and tidiness ! ). This time, we initially thought that we would really give this business our best shot and get rid of the unnecessary garbage that we keep collecting as time passes. But as always happens, we were also caught up in many other things and didn’t have time enough to do this. So, in the last 2-3 days, we decided to focus only on the external appearance and take up the root cleaning some other time. Obviously, as everyone knows, this means that we pushed things into cupboards and drawers and also on the attic. And by the time the guests arrived, our house looked clean and beautiful !

As I was going through this entire process, something struck me. Just as we had pushed unwanted stuff in places where it was not visible, don’t we do the same with our emotions and feelings ? Many times, we cannot openly express what we truly feel due to various reasons, and we push these feelings under the carpet…. And there they stay for a long time. Outwardly, we may put up a facade which is happy and beautiful but there are a lot of suppressed negative emotions like anger or hatred or jealousy or sadness lurking inside. Obviously, when we suppress anything too much, it’s bound to come out some time or the other and more often than not, when it comes out, it’s like a volcano erupting! This can create a lot of problems, harming our relationships with those who are the recipients of this volcanic eruption.

Just as we need to periodically clean our house and get rid of all the garbage and unnecessary stuff, shouldn’t we also clear the attic of our minds of these suppressed emotions? And it’s best if we can do this on a regular basis. The most effective method of getting this done is, of course, meditation. Some Osho meditations like the Dynamic Meditation can help catharsis and release of suppressed negative emotions. Meditation can also help us get in touch with our deepest fears and feelings. It’s easier to deal with this negativity once we are aware that we are harbouring so much negativity inside ourselves.

Hope that all of us can regularly clean out not only our homes but also our inner selves,

Love,

Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

“So many years of education, and yet no one taught us how to love ourselves and why it is so important.” When I read these words, I was transported back in time to a very sad moment almost 40 years ago. The occasion was the prayer meeting for a classmate, a young, dynamic, highly intelligent and gifted person who had died at a very early age, he was just 21 years old when he died. The death of anyone in his prime is always extremely saddening, but this particular death was all the more tragic because it was a suicide. Everyone who heard about it was shocked.
At the prayer meeting, the Principal of our school spoke a few words. He too, was devastated by this tragedy. He said,” We have been teaching our students many lessons in school. But we have failed miserably because we have not taught them important lessons about life !”
His words are true even today, because though we have excellent schools imparting education, they are still not teaching the students how to live. Many students are high achievers in terms of academic success but when it comes to dealing with life’s challenges, they are sadly lacking. These days, Psychiatrists and other mental health professionals are finding that though these youngsters are highly intelligent, when it comes to managing their emotions, they are not up to the mark. These high achievers ( in academics ) find it difficult to face failures, they cannot handle their frustrations well, their anxiety levels are high, many of them are not just depressed but indulge in self-harm and are suicidal too.
All the educational institutions, while focusing on studies, have totally neglected the emotional aspects of their students. And that’s why, some of them fail miserably in life in spite of their sharp intellect. A good IQ or intelligence quotient is of course essential for success in life. But if a good IQ is not accompanied by a good EQ or emotional quotient, it is difficult to achieve success.
That’s why, all the educational institutions as well as parents need to be paying more attention to the emotional development of children and adolescents and not just focus on scholastic achievements. And actually, the seeds of emotional training need to be sown in early childhood. More about this some other time.

Hoping that all educational institutions grasp the importance of emotional intelligence and take steps towards this goal,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

P. S. Our youtube channel Bhatawdekars’ clinic has created various videos on how to nurture the emotional intelligence of preschoolers. Though these videos are primarily meant for parents and teachers of preschoolers, the principles hold true at any age.
The links for these videos are as follows:

English videos-
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYTn0siuWwWE9a-r_H4C0P-vp7cyxa28i

Marathi videos-
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYTn0siuWwWHqTWZGUo4_erxk3Re5B-lL

Do go through these videos, especially the ones talking about emotional development.

Good morning friends

My son Satyajit is always encouraging me to use the new gadgets for various tasks. Some of them are, no doubt, extremely useful and time saving. A few days ago, I had drawn my daily Mandala on iPad. Once he realised that I am comfortable with using the iPad, he introduced me to photoshop. Now, photoshop has so many features that it is impossible to utilise it to its maximum capacity with just a few hours’ practice. I loved the way I could use brushes of different sizes and a wide range of colours that were available. I also liked the option of using various layers which allows you to make changes in only one particular layer. I could also correct my mistakes easily, there was no danger of a particular coloured pen getting over, there was no smudging. So, all in all, it looks like the ideal method for drawing and painting. And yet….

And yet, I prefer the age old method of using a pen and paper to create a Mandala. No doubt that the photoshop is exciting and interesting, but it doesn’t have the same feel as holding a real pen in your hands and converting a plain paper into a masterpiece. While using a digital medium, I miss the feel of the pen on the paper, I miss the almost inaudible sound of the pen scratching the paper, I miss the wonderful feeling of creating something unique, something personal. I prefer the stains of colours on my fingers while using actual pens rather than having clean fingers while using a digital medium.

The photoshop gives me the option of erasing every mistake and drawing a perfect picture. But at times, to me, imperfection is preferred to absolute perfection. I have been drawing Mandalas for more than 4 years now and I have drawn almost 200 Mandalas so far. But I have never rejected or torn a Mandala because something was not quite up to the mark. Whenever I make a mistake, I always try to rectify it by making changes in the design or the shape. And in fact, that makes me happier. I think this is because If something is very easy to accomplish, it doesn’t give the same kind of satisfaction as overcoming a challenge. Anything that you achieve after going through difficulties is more precious to you. When you meet a challenge, and excel, it is more satisfying. So, I have decided to stick to paper and pen and reserve the use of the iPad for travel. It’s more challenging and more satisfying !

I do hope that each of us can experience the Joy of creation in some way or the other, and also enjoy overcoming challenges,

Love,

Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

As I was writing about the feel of the pen on paper yesterday, I remembered other memorable sensations associated with arts. Satyajit studied in a Steiner school. ( also called Waldorf school ). Unlike normal schools which focus primarily on the intellectual development of a child, Steiner schools focus on the development of head, heart and limbs. So there was a lot of emphasis on arts in his school. As he dabbled in the various forms of arts, we too, were introduced to some new arts forms like formdrawing. The school held special classes for parents to participate in the numerous arts activities that the students were exposed to. I remember attending classes for formdrawing and pottery and hand puppet making and I enjoyed them thoroughly. I still remember the feel of the mud on my hands and fingers in the pottery class and the wonderful sense of accomplishment that I had when I created and baked a diya on the back of an elephant.
Formdrawing involves repetitive drawing of simple forms like half circles or triangles initially and goes on to become more and more complex in higher grades. I had a lovely time in this class too. I was totally engrossed in this art form and practised it often.
I also enjoyed the eurhythmy workshop in which we were taught slow rhythmic movements ,it was a meditative experience for me.
The painting class was also a very special one. I remember that kindergarten students were taught to wet the paper first and then colour it. Later, they were taught finger painting by dipping their fingers in paint. All these activities were wonderful for the sensory development of young children. The children were also encouraged to play with various textures which again aided the sensory processing. Hand puppets, finger exercises, and in later years stitching and crochet helped in hand-eye coordination. Beeswax was another technique frequently used in kindergarten. In fact,all these activities resembled techniques in occupational therapy which is used for children with problems like ADHD.

All these lovely memories were rekindled when I talked about the feel of the pen on the paper yesterday and I relived the wonderful days of my son’s childhood.

Arts can play such a major role in a child’s and also a parent’s development, I do hope that every child gets an opportunity to create wonders in the art form of his / her liking.
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

Don’t you think that life has turned extremely hectic and stressful these days? As compared to 35 years ago, when we started our medical practice, the number of patients with anxiety, stress and tensions has increased manyfold over the past few years. And these ongoing stresses have deleterious effects on our health leading to ever increasing health problems like hypertension, diabetes, heart disease, ulcers and acidity, chronic back pain and so on.

Meditation can tremendously help reduce the impact of life’s stresses on our health.

When we think about meditation, we visualise someone sitting quietly with eyes closed. But this kind of meditation, though it worked wonders 3000 years ago in Buddha’s time, is not so helpful for the modern man, simply because the pace of life is very fast in modern times. That’s why, Osho designed many different techniques of meditation which are tailor-made for the modern man. Osho created these techniques keeping in mind the challenges of the modern world. And they involve a lot of physical activity like dancing or humming after which it’s easier to sit quietly in Vipassana.

Before the pandemic, we used to regularly conduct meditation sessions in our clinic every week. Now, as we are resuming normal life once again, we are planning to restart these sessions every week, tentatively on Tuesday afternoon and/or Saturday morning. We will conduct these sessions at our clinic only by appointment. If any of you or your friends are interested in participating in these sessions, please message me. Alternatively, you can call/ send a message on WhatsApp on our clinic number 9769434603.

Osho has said that we need to spread the message of meditation like wildfire !

I do hope that everyone can get a taste of the wonderful experiences that meditation can bring in our lives,

Love,

Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

A few days ago, I had planned to meet some girlfriends for lunch at a restaurant near my place. Just as I was getting out of the house to reach the restaurant, I got a call for an emergency visit which I could not refuse. It was from a family friend living in our society, so I immediately went there. It took me about 20 minutes to examine the patient and give advice. By the time I finished this visit, I was getting late for the lunch get together. As the restaurant was quite near my place , it would have been difficult to get an auto to take me to the restaurant and it would take me at least 10 minutes to walk there. Just then, I saw a friend near the gate of our society with his scooter. This was a Godsent opportunity and I grabbed it with both my hands. I requested my friend to drop me near the restaurant and he readily agreed. That is how I could reach the restaurant just a few minutes later than the decided time. We had a wonderful time together, chitchatting, exchanging the happenings during the lock down and enjoying the lovely food. The soup was very good, the starters were excellent and the dal rice, which followed was delicious. I have a sweet tooth, so I had kept some place for the dessert. But when the dessert arrived, it was a great disappointment. It did not match the quality of the food we had had earlier. In fact it left a very bad after taste in my mouth. We left the place soon afterwards and I came home. In the evening my family asked me about the get together and unconsciously I was about to start complaining about the dessert. However, luckily, I caught myself just in time. I realised with a jerk that I was complaining about something which occupied only 10 to 15% of the entire time we had spent together. The rest 85 to 90% of the time was spent very happily, enjoying the company of my friends, relishing the sumptuous meal. Why then, was I focusing on the 10 or 15% which was not to my liking ?

Don’t we do this very often in life? After a bad experience, we label that particular situation (or the place or the person ) as very bad. In fact, if we were to analyse the situation we would realise that these experiences are similar to this lunch get together that I had. The pleasant portion of the experience is much more than the unpleasant one. What if I decided to focus on the enjoyable time that I had at the get together ( including the unexpected lift to the restaurant ) and ignore the dessert ? I decided to give it a try and talked more about the good time that I had and just made a passing mention of the not-so-good dessert.

Can we do this with life situations too ? We generally tend to remember the bad moments, failures, hurts and insults more than the good moments,successes and appreciations. I am sure that if we decide to focus on the positive aspects of any situation and try and ignore or play down the negative aspects, we would be much happier. ( Of course, it doesn’t mean that you take things lying down. You should make every effort to rectify the situation whenever it is possible )

After this wonderful awakening, I have resolved to focus on the positives in any situation and not harp too much on the negatives,

Love,

Anjali Bhatawdekar

Good morning friends

On Friday, we were privileged to attend the prestigious Dr. Nitu Mandke Oration. The speaker was eminent cardiac surgeon Dr. Anvay Mulay, famous for his heart transplant surgeries. Manoj and Anvay are classmates, so we know firsthand that Anvay is not only an excellent cardiac surgeon but also a wonderful human being. Anvay was talking on “ New frontiers impacting cardiac surgery “. Obviously, he talked a lot about the recent advances in the techniques of cardiac surgery but he also touched upon some basic concepts. While talking about cardiac valve surgeries, he made a profound statement. He said, “We still cannot match God given valves in spite of the advances in technology” …. And is this not true for many other parts of our body ?We don’t realise or value the wonderful, super computers that our bodies are, until something goes wrong with them. We take our bodies for granted, we are ready to complain when some body part is not working well but we hardly ever stop to thank our bodies. Our body is such a complex machinery, with so many organs and systems working smoothly and efficiently 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, with no holidays !
Anvay’s statement once again reminded me that I need to thank the Creator of this beautiful but complex system that we are endowed with.
Let us take a few moments every day to thank the creator for this incredible and inimitable creation called body,
Love,
Anjali Bhatawdekar